LADIES – DO YOU KNOW HOW TO LOVE?
A few days ago, the term ‘wife material’ got me thinking – how many women know what to expect before jumping into marriage? Do we truly grasp what it means to love?
Ladies – I know you have an idea of what love is. Let us, however, take a quick look at the biblical view of love in the context of relationships – real love beyond the lovey-dovey and romantic moments.
1 Corinthians 13:4-5 “Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged.” (NLT)
1. Love is patient
Patience is one of those qualities that’s hard to cultivate in close relationships. There are many reasons for a woman to be impatient with her man – like the toilet seat always left up, dishes left in the sitting room, and coming home late. Most of us are naturally impatient because we want everything to go our way. God’s expectation, however, is that we show love by being patient with our significant others.
When a marriage begins, both partners have high expectations of each other. The husband and wife expect each other to do things in a certain way. When this does not happen in your relationship, do you walk away? Do you blame God for giving you the wrong person? No! You ask God to grant you the patience to see your partner mature into the person that God intended. Let your love for this man and your patience with him encourage him to grow.
2. Love is not jealous
Let’s be honest here – how many of us are in competition with their men? When he comes home late, you hit back by doing the same thing the next day. When he goes out with his buddies, you sulk and don’t talk to him for days. Isn’t that a sign of jealousy?
Marriage is a partnership. You and your partner are now companions in the journey of life. As such, you share achievements, joys, and sorrows. You also give each other space to grow through interaction with other people. If you support your partner, he will support you. If you show jealousy towards him, he will find someone else to share his successes with.
3. Love does not demand its own way
Selfishness is the reason many marriages don’t work out. We are all naturally selfish. It takes God’s power to begin to think of someone else as more important than you. God’s order of marriage demands that you treat your spouse better than yourself.
Placing someone else at a higher level than you can be a tall order. Think about it this way, though. If you give your man love, concern, and respect daily, he will begin to treat you in the same way. Isn’t that what you desired in the first place?
4. Love keeps no record of wrongs
Women are experts at keeping records of all the wrongs done to them since time immemorial. Whenever your spouse hurts you, memories of all the bad things he has ever done (some that he doesn’t even remember) come flooding back.
The truth is your spouse will hurt you, many times. You must learn to forgive, forget and let go every time. Ask God for his help to deal with the hurts and to help you forgive. Remember that unforgiveness hurts the person who keeps the bitterness and memories inside their hearts. Love your man therefore by forgiving him every time he does wrong.
There you go – a few characteristics of love in the context of the marriage relationship. Make them part of your everyday routine as you interact with your significant other. Happy loving!
Missed our last reflection? Here it is – singles-lets-talk-about-realities-of marriage